Resume errors ...
How bad a mistake can you make on your resume? Here are some
real-life examples:
- "My intensity and focus are at inordinately high
levels, and my ability to complete projects on time is
unspeakable."
- "Education: Curses in liberal arts, curses in
computer science, curses in accounting."
- "Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a
Midwest chain store."
- "Personal: Married, 1992 Chevrolet."
- "I have an excellent track record, although I am not
a horse."
- "I am a rabid typist."
- "Created a new market for pigs by processing,
advertising and selling a gourmet pig mail order service
on the side."
- "Exposure to German for two years, but many words
are not appropriate for business."
- "Proven ability to track down and correct
erors."
- "Personal interests: Donating blood. 15 gallons so
far."
- "I have become completely paranoid, trusting
completely nothing and absolutely no one."
- "References: None, I've left a path of destruction
behind me."
- "Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while
maintaining composer."
- "Don't take the comments of my former employer too
seriously, they were unappreciative beggars and slave
drivers."
- "My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I
possess no training in meteroology, I suppose I should
try stock brokerage."
- "I procrastinate--especially when the task is
unpleasant."
- "I am loyal to my employer at all costs ..Please
feel free to resond to my resume on my office
voicemanil."
- "Qualifications: No education or experience."
- "Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets."
- "Accomplishments: Oversight of entire
department."
- "Extensive background in accounting. I can also
stand on my head!"
- Cover letter: "Thank you for your consideration.
Hope to hear from you shorty!"
Last modified: 11/26/1997